It's me, cynnie. Finally, I found some time to settle down with my laptop, a cup of Americano and a mind filled with thoughts.
With so many things happening lately, it is one of those times that we feel grateful for every day that we wake up to.
For every sunshine and moonlight we see.
Every breath we take.
Every bite we take.
Every experiences we have.
Every emotions we feel.
Every interactions we have with our loved ones.
It hits upon so hardly that life's predicament will always catch us unexpectedly. Today, I could be worrying about how my grades are going to turn out. Tomorrow, I could be worrying about finding a job and how life is going to go on after university. The reason why we worked so hard, is for the sake of our future. But at the same time, how many times I felt like I have made myself and my life absolutely horrible. Sometimes, it's not just us. The comments and the way that the others look at us, often affects the way that we look at ourselves. Looking back, I can finally see the amount of unhappiness trapped within me, the amount of negativity. The amount of sadness I have given to my parents, because of how I was. At the end of the day, what are we really fighting for?
Are we fighting for ourselves, or are we fighting for the recognition of others? Is it just social standards that we are using to gauge whether we are successful, happy or as intelligent as the others? These are those questions that I often ask myself, especially when I have so much more alone time. I tend to think a lot more. No matter what it is, there's no harm in expressing to our loved ones how much we love them, how much we appreciate them. Sometimes, my sister asks me - how do I live with such positivity in my life. Simply put into words, by thinking of what's the worst that could happen and what I am experiencing is definitely not the worst. And I am blessed with whatever that comes to me: the family I was born into, the friends I have made, the rough patches that I have undergone in my life. I love all of you, each and every one of you. Remember, there's always someone that loves you so deeply, unconditionally, that you will want to live your life to the utmost. I will live as a better person, and I want to make people that I have met before to be a bit happier, even if it is a tiny weeny bit. The best version of ourselves are crafted by ourselves, and to love ourselves is the only way that we will know how to love the others :)
cynnie.
